Addressing the Root Cause of Bullying

by Mar 3, 2025

 

 

Addressing the root cause of Bullying: A call for fair and effective solutions.

Bullying in middle and high schools remains a persistent issue, causing emotional distress, academic struggles, and even long-term psychological damage to victims.

However, what is even more concerning is the way schools often handle these situations. In many cases, it is the victim who faces punishment while the bully walks away unscathed.

When a victim reaches their breaking point and retaliate, they are the ones who end up in trouble, often facing detentions, suspensions, or even expulsion. Meanwhile, the root cause of the bullying remains unaddressed.

So why do school authorities fail to effectively tackle bullying?

Is it a reluctance to acknowledge that a problem exists, or is it a lack of proper strategies to handle it?

Schools need to rethink their approach to bullying by focusing on conflict resolution, understanding the reasons behind a bully’s behaviour, and ensuring that accountability measures are fair and just.

Why Do Schools Ignore the Root Cause of Bullying?

Many schools prefer to maintain the illusion of a “safe learning environment” rather than admit that bullying is a significant issue.

Acknowledging a bullying problem might make a school appear ineffective in maintaining discipline, which could reflect poorly on its reputation.

This denial often leads to surface-level solutions such as anti-bullying posters and occasional assemblies rather than genuine intervention strategies.

Additionally, some schools lack the necessary resources or training to handle bullying effectively.

Many teachers and administrators are not equipped with conflict resolution skills, leading them to resort to punitive measures rather than addressing the deeper issues at play.

This results in a cycle where the victim is disciplined for standing up for themselves, while the bully continues their behaviour unchecked.

Understanding Why Bullies Bully

One of the most overlooked aspects of dealing with bullying is understanding why the bully behaves this way in the first place.

Often, bullies themselves have been victims of abuse, neglect, or social rejection. Their behaviour might stem from insecurity, a need for power, or a desire to mask their own vulnerabilities.

Some may be mimicking aggressive behaviour they have witnessed at home or in their social circles. Without addressing these underlying issues, punitive measures alone will not stop the cycle of bullying.

Instead of merely punishing bullies, schools should focus on providing them with counselling, mentorship,  NLP Coaching, and structured interventions.

Teaching empathy, emotional regulation, and healthy communication skills can help bullies recognise the harm they are causing and encourage them to change their behaviour.

A Fairer Approach: Conflict Resolution

One of the most effective ways to address bullying is through conflict resolution. Rather than isolating the victim or allowing resentment to build, structured mediation sessions between the bully and the victim can be beneficial.

In a controlled environment, guided by a trained mediator (such as a teacher, counsellor, NLP Coach or external conflict resolution specialist), both parties can openly discuss their feelings, experiences, and perspectives.

Conflict resolution sessions can help bullies understand the impact of their actions, while also giving victims a safe space to express their emotions. This approach fosters mutual understanding, encourages accountability, and helps prevent further incidents.

Schools should implement structured conflict resolution programs, ensuring that trained professionals facilitate these discussions. Additionally, peer mediation programs can be introduced, where trained student mediators help resolve conflicts among their peers.

Rethinking Punishment: Should the Bully Be Isolated Instead?

Another common yet flawed approach in schools is punishing the victim instead of the bully. Often, a bullied student is removed from class, isolated, or even suspended when they finally retaliate.

This sends a damaging message: that standing up for oneself results in negative consequences while bullies face little to no repercussions.

Instead, schools should consider alternative disciplinary measures that place responsibility where it belongs—on the bully. If a student is repeatedly engaging in harmful behaviour, they should be the ones placed in isolation, given behavioural interventions, or required to participate in restorative justice programs.

Removing the bully from the learning environment, rather than the victim, ensures that students who genuinely want to learn are not unfairly penalized.

Moreover, positive reinforcement strategies should be employed alongside disciplinary actions. Encouraging and rewarding good behaviour, teaching social-emotional skills, and providing mentorship opportunities can create an environment where students are less likely to turn to bullying.

What Schools Can Do Moving Forward

To effectively tackle bullying, schools need to implement a multi-faceted approach that includes:

Acknowledging the Problem – Schools must openly recognise bullying as a real issue rather than dismissing it or covering it up.

 

Providing Training for Staff – Teachers and administrators should receive training in conflict resolution, emotional intelligence, and intervention strategies.

 

Introducing Conflict Resolution Programs – Structured mediation sessions can help address bullying in a way that fosters understanding and accountability.

 

Holding Bullies Accountable – Instead of punishing victims for defending themselves, schools should focus on rehabilitating bullies and providing appropriate consequences for their actions.

 

Offering Support for Victims – Schools should provide counselling, coaching, safe spaces, and peer support programs to help victims heal and regain confidence.

 

Encouraging Peer Mediation – Student-led mediation programs can empower young people to resolve conflicts among their peers in a constructive manner.

Final Thoughts

The current approach to bullying in many schools is flawed, often punishing the victim while allowing the bully to continue their behaviour unchecked.

By addressing the root cause of bullying, implementing conflict resolution strategies, and ensuring that accountability measures are fair, schools can create a safer and more supportive learning environment for all students.

If we truly want to combat bullying, we must shift from a reactive stance to a proactive one. Schools should not only discipline bullies but also work to rehabilitate them, provide support for victims, and foster a culture of empathy and respect.

Only then can we break the cycle of bullying and create an educational system where every student feels safe, valued, and empowered to learn.

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Who Is Karen Baughan?

Karen Baughan is an NLP Master Practitioner based in Bromsgrove, UK. Having used NLP to affect her own personal transformation, she now helps clients, from around the world, to transform their lives and achieve their dreams.